Thursday, March 17, 2011

Offense

So, I had a sweet little post to write about what a good night last night was, but I am struggling a little bit now.  It was mutual night, and I had a great time with the youth learning to dance for the dinner/dance that we're having next week.  All of the kids were such good sports, and they were really cute learning all of the steps.  When I got home from church I found the kids in bed, a superbly cleaned kitchen, and my favorite night time snack waiting for me on the counter. 


All was well, but then I got a phone call.  I had offended someone.  I absolutely did not mean to hurt any feelings, but I did.  I have run through the situation in my head about a billion times and I just can't reconcile what I meant with what happened.  I was anxious about it all night and all day today.  It was the last thought in my head before I went to bed and the first one in my head this morning when I woke up.  I know I wasn't trying to be awful, so why can't I put it aside?  I guess it really comes down to the horrible feeling that someone else assumed the worst of me. 

I have cried about it and prayed about it, and I know that it will pass, but for now it hurts my heart.

5 comments:

Desiree' said...

Laura, I'm so sorry that someone was offended at something you said. You just cannot worry about it. You had the best of intentions. Your heart was in the right place.
Something I've decided is that you have no control over what people think about you. You just have to do your best and keep going. It's our choice if we want to be offended. If you meant nothing by it, and have done all you could to remedy the situation you both just have to move on. Good luck! I think you're the best! :)

Sean and Amy said...

Laura, I didn't know that this happened too often in the church until Amy was called as secretary for the relief society in our current ward. Unfortunately she's had the same thing happen to her numerous times (almost every Sunday) over the last few months. And for very little, petty things that I never thought would offend someone (making the sign-up sheet the wrong way, or forgetting to announce something in a certain order). As a husband, it gets me riled up.

But I'm starting to see that the more that you serve, the more people seem to get offended. For example, we just had a new Bishop called, and all of a sudden there were 10 new family's coming to church. For some reason the old Bishop had offended them, but since he was gone they were ready to come back.

The reason that you feel so hurt by it is probably because you have such a good heart, and you're trying so hard to serve. Keep it up. You are awesome, and you're not alone.

Bruce said...

May those who love us, love us; and those who don't love us,
may God turn their hearts; and if He doesn't turn their hearts,
may he turn their ankles so we'll know them by their limping.
Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Kendra said...

I'm so sorry, Laura. That is awful and of course it just makes you feel terrible. Especially when someone takes something totally wrong from how it was intended. Like you said, it's har when someone assumes the worst of you and sadly when often, no matter what you say, they still have a different perception. But I know you, and you are a kind, genuine person. Obviously it is their choice to be offended and you can't control that. I hope they realize that it was just a misunderstanding and come to know and love the real you!

Annie said...

Oh Laura - I'm so sorry you felt so bad! After having worked with you for awhile I know you never have bad intentions and would never intentionally hurt someone's feelings. That said, I know how it feels to find out that someone THOUGHT you hurt them - and that's not fun!!

My mom supposedly hurt my cousin's feelings and she avoided and wouldn't talk to her for YEARS - she even refused to come to my bridal shower because it was at my mom's house. My sweet mom to this day has NO idea what she did!

And reading that comment about families who didn't come to church because a former bishop offended them? Wow. Let go, people!! Move on!

Can't we all just be friends?? :) Love you Laura!